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Parenting With A Purpose
Donna Janel Williams, a Chester native is on a mission to bring back the responsibility, nobility, and beauty back to parenting. Parenting With A Purpose show aims to reach, teach and propel single mom, single dads, married, divorced, adopted, and foster parents all over the world with engaging conversations to help parents raise up successful leaders. Donna Janel believes parents are the bows and children are the arrows and they will land in the direction we aim them.
Parenting With A Purpose
The Legacy of Parenthood: Weaving Growth, Purpose, and Perseverance into the Fabric of Family Life
Ever find yourself in the midst of a parenting quandary, like that time I scoured the house for a wayward Bluetooth speaker, only to discover it nestled in my teenager's room? These moments, both maddening and mundane, are the threads in the rich tapestry of parenting that we tug at in today's heartfelt dialogue. We weave through the complexities of communication, loss, and the transformative power of responsibility, alongside my special guest, Jean- Pierre Brice, also known as Uncle P. His journey from anger to gratitude, from CMP radio station owner to beacon of community change, underscores our shared narrative of growth and the pursuit of purpose.
Parenting with a Purpose isn't just a catchphrase; it's a living, breathing mission that takes shape in the stories we share. As P open up about the pivotal moments of his past—the loss of his father, his brush with street life, and the dream that propelled him toward starting his own radio station—we discover the sustaining force of support and belief. Uncle P's insights remind us that our experiences aren't just personal milestones, but guideposts for our children's futures, and the importance of breaking negative cycles for their sakes.
Join us as we celebrate the essence of perseverance and the fruits of intentional parenting, from the revelation of watching his son handle money to the influence of a young woman's encouragement. Together, we explore how family, compassion, and the indomitable human spirit can lead us to sacrifice, overcome hardship, and ultimately, build a legacy that echoes through generations. So, tune in, as we share tales of redemption, the relentless pursuit of our dreams, and the indelible marks we leave through the noble art of parenting.
Parents are the Bows and Children are the Arrows they will land wherever we aim them eventually!
Thank you everybody. My name is donna, also known as donna janelle, a ceo founder of parenting with a purpose. Our strive here at the podcast is to reach every home, whether single moms, married single dads, whatever it is, foster parents, just bringing the ownership and responsibility and nobility back into parenting. Get comfortable with uncomfortable conversations. All parents need some help and guidance and I'm just here to be a guide. Hey everybody, welcome back to Parenting with a Purpose. I am your host, donna Janelle.
Speaker 1:You know where I strive and aim to bring back the responsibility, no, and beauty back into parenting. I'm gonna repeat that responsibility, nobility and beauty back into parenting. I know some of y'all out there thinking beauty back into parenting. What say what? I know it's a hard knock life out here for parents. It's very challenging and it's kind of hard to see the beauty when there's so many different challenges.
Speaker 1:Um, as we're trying to raise our children to be successful, right, but you know, parents are the bows and our children are arrows and they will land wherever we send them. May not be today, may not be tomorrow, hey, it might not even be the next two to three years, but eventually, if we give them the right tools, if we close them and we don't send them outside naked. They will land where we aim them, even if it's not in the way we want to aim them, but they will land and end up being successful. Trust me on that. So you know, I got a story Always got a story about the one that test my inner gangster. But it's more of a question for people, right? You know, back in the day when we were growing up, you know, if we were told to do a chore, we would make sure that our chores was done before our parents got home. If they told whatever they told us to do, even if it was like an hour before they got home, we might have been chilling for like eight hours off of school, chilling at home and just doing whatever we do, right, but we knew about roundabout what time our parents would be home. So we would make sure that we would do everything we need to do.
Speaker 1:These kids these days don't do that and I know it's not just my kids, because I had a conversation today with one of my classmates and we were just talking about kids don't even like, don't even care, they don't think. Now, you know, I used to. You know making sure, oh, the other thing is that they use they'll use your stuff right, and then they leave the evidence instead of just putting it like if I borrow something to my moms or my dads or whatever, they would never know that I touched it, or they would know that somebody touched it, but they never would know who was, when and how. These kids they are so bold with it. Now, the one that tested my inner gangsta I had like a whole attitude at 4 o'clock this morning. Y'all, and y'all know I'll be trying to calm my attitude down because some things just don't make sense. I told you I don't know what they thinking and they don't know what I think. I think there's literally some type of cross, something is off with the communication with me and my teens. You know they're about to be 16 this month. Y'all got two about to be 16, got one about to be 18, all within the next 30 days. Yes, I hope everybody out there praying for me, because I'm praying for myself too.
Speaker 1:All right, so I have a Bluetooth right Bluetooth speaker in the bathroom, because I try to make sure that none of our phones are anything in the bathroom, because that moisture get into your phone or your phone drop in the toilet, drop in the shower. I just really try to keep phones. That's one of my rules keep your phone out the bathroom. So I purchased a Bluetooth, the Bluetooth, right. I listen to it when I'm getting ready. You know, everybody listens to the Bluetooth. The one that tests my ending game says so.
Speaker 1:I go in the bathroom at 4 o'clock this morning. Mind you, it's spring break, so they're not home, only the 16-year-old, only the boy home today. Right, the girls aren't. And I go in there at 4 o'clock this morning and go and try to go turn my Bluetooth on so I can get in the shower, so I can get up out of there by 5 o'clock. Right, I don't see my Bluetooth nowhere. Where is my Bluetooth? All right, okay, donna, where's your Bluetooth, where's your Bluetooth? And I was like I took a deep breath. Y'all, y'all know I'm telling you I be having to take a deep breath because I be trying deep breath and I'm like, all right, I went back in my room, checked to see if my Bluetooth was in there. Now, mind you, it's a good size. It's a pretty good size of a Bluetooth.
Speaker 1:I go in my room. I knew I didn't put it in my room. I checked, okay, it's not in there. I go back in the bathroom, y'all Like you know. But I just didn't want to go off, I didn't want to snap.
Speaker 1:So then I go in a girl's room both of their rooms. They have separate rooms. So I go in the one that's about to be 18. I go in her room. I don't see the Bluetooth. I go in the one that's about to be 16. I don't see the Bluetooth. Son me out of house and home. So I'm like, okay, okay, okay. So I take another deep breath and I'm gonna go back in my room.
Speaker 1:I'm telling you, I'm going through it just to go find my bluetooth because I want to listen to some music while I'm taking a shower. I don't see my bluetooth. So I text him. I said listen in bold, y'all. I was literally. It was in bold letters like listen whoever was disrespectful you know, disrespect is my right Whoever was disrespectful and removed my Bluetooth out of the bathroom. By the time I get off of my show tonight, my Bluetooth better be back in the bathroom. And guess who? It was the one that test my inner gangster.
Speaker 1:I didn't want to blame her at first. Right, I didn't want to because it seemed like me and her blamed shift all the time and it was her. So she says yes, I took it out and it's in my room. Now, mind you, I went in her room and looked for it. Couldn't find it. She said it's in my room. I'm sorry I didn't put it back. And I was like listen, I don't have an issue with you using my stuff, just make sure you put it back.
Speaker 1:So these kids these days are so different than when we grew up, because, I mean, my parents would never even know I took something or did something, because I made sure it went back in the same spot. These kids know they just do whatever they want to do and I don't know if it's me or if it's them, or if it's them or if it's me, I don't know what it is, but I know I ain't the only parent out here struggling about this. I know that y'all kids do stuff and you and you're like what is going on? Why are you touching my stuff? Why you got to touch my stuff, right, all right, I didn't have that issue when they was little, but one of the things that I realized is that and I'm just going to keep saying this over and over again.
Speaker 1:I don't own my kids and I think that's one of the things that's helping me realize that you don't own these kids, donna. You had these kids but you don't own them. You know they got their own minds and thoughts and we hope that our kids are going to do what we want them to do, the things that we trained them and we taught them. Like last week we talked about morals and values, right, we hoped that that was going to be the case, but sometimes they got their own journey, they got their own mind and sometimes it doesn't click with ours. So I'm starting to realize I don't own them and they're going to do what they want to do.
Speaker 1:Sometimes and I'm going to have to be a daughter about it I'm going to have to take a deep breath and try to handle it like a 40-year-old. Okay, that's what I'm going to try to do. I want y'all to pray for me. I'm going to pray for y'all. So that's my little spiel Tonight tonight. Tonight, tonight night, we are talking to the one and only John Pierre Bryce. Tonight, everybody know him as Uncle P, but he knows I won't call him Uncle P, right?
Speaker 2:You can call me Uncle P twice, not to my face, behind my back, behind your back, yeah.
Speaker 1:So tonight we're going to get into a conversation of. P has an amazing story, a remarkable story from just a whole life transformation. And I really want parents to really get this and understand, because sometimes we think that when we did, how we start, is going to be how we finish, or the trials and tribulations that we've gone through could potentially end us down a road that we can't turn back from. But Pia's story of transformation, how things that happen in his life and how parenting has helped him look at life a little different and for the better. So, p, welcome to the show.
Speaker 2:How you doing, donna, it's nice to be here.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and for all y'all who don't know, p is the owner of Cultivate and Matured Positivity CMP radio station. That is where, that is where parents with a purpose podcast is from. Like thanks to P, like we here, we here, we in the streets now. So I certainly thank you and I just think your story is remarkable. So, p, what's up?
Speaker 2:I don't know. I'm living life, bro. I'm excited for every new day, right, every day you wake up, there's something new that can happen, something new you're going to learn, right. So I'm just excited for that. I'm excited to have an opportunity to bring something to my community, right, you know, communication open up the lanes of communication. I'm not saying they were closed, but they were dying off. Everybody was frustrated, everybody was mad and we were pointing fingers. And let's just have some open dialogue, let's just talk. I might say some things that might piss you off, right, but you know that's how I feel. You know, if I love you, I shouldn't be able to make you mad at how I feel. Right, because you know I love you. You know I'll do anything for you. You know I'll get down to the ground for you and do some things right, right, but we have to change, right, and change sometimes is difficult. Change sometimes hurts, you know people. So you know, knowing that we can't stay here, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2:Like can you imagine like we were on a ship and we were drowning and you said I'm not moving where I'm at, I'm not moving where I'm at.
Speaker 1:I'm going, you're going to die. You can't stay here.
Speaker 2:So that's what happens, right? So you know, I'm just excited for the day, I'm grateful, I'm thankful you feel me. I have nothing, but just the utmost respect for everyone, right? I'm not trying to disrespect anyone.
Speaker 1:I had to learn that, because I didn't always know, walk with that, right, I was, I was, I was, I was a mad little boy, bro. Yeah, let's talk about that. You, you know, let's talk about that. We're gonna go from from from, yay, high to high, high. So it's a little bit. I know we had you on the show before talking about a little bit about, um, when your dad passed away when you were 12 and some things that you ended up getting to. But I want, I want to talk about it again, um, because I think it's so important, because it kind of like I'm a stronger believer that things that we've gone through in our experiences in our past kind of catapults us into our purpose and our destiny, whether we know it or not. Like I think that things build us stronger so that we're able to handle, you know, what god has in store for us always. So just listen to your story and kind of know a little bit about your story. I'm like, yeah, you were set up for this.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, I mean, that's the way it appears now, right, you know I had a conversation and the man told me you know, many roads lead you to the same destination. You chose this road for a reason. Right, understand that the things that you feel like you lost or the things that you think you went through only gave you strength, right?
Speaker 2:And it gave you an opportunity to say I went through that, I felt that, I felt that pain. So my father died. I was 12 years old, right, I was a happy 12-year-old, right, like happy, like you know, super happy. I was being raised to be a minister in a church. You know what I mean a pastor. My father, you know he was catholic, so that's you know, jean Pierre Bryce. Right, that was a big thing. On the other side, he was also raising me to, to, to be a doctor. You know what I mean. So if the minister thing didn't work out, you could be a doctor, and he used to always tell me so. My father was from Port-au-Prince, haiti, so he came here. When he was young, he started driving taxi cabs. He started working. For as long as I knew my father, he was always working. He always had a job. He might have had two jobs Sound like you.
Speaker 2:Right. So that's where I get it from, because, unlike him, he came here at 18. He knew what he wanted, right? He wanted something better right. I was lost. When my father passed away, I felt like my whole world was stripped from me right, If it wasn't for my mother and my grandmother and my aunts and my uncles. You feel me. I can look back on my life and say everyone, everyone that was in my life, had an effect on my life. Like touch me in some not like that not touch me like that but touch me in a way that allowed me to grow.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:And gave me space. They didn't always give me space. Sometimes I took it. You feel me Just being disrespectful, so I understand, right how things can, just as a teenager you're going through. I was 12, right, you know what I mean. Like I was 12, my dad was. He was gone, he wasn't coming, he was not coming back right and I was pissed. Yeah, I was mad like why? Why, my father? You know, I'm looking. I'm looking at a friend, his dad drunk, over there in the corner, why?
Speaker 2:not him like why don't you take him right? Like why, why does he get? That's how bad. I was like looking at people's fathers and like you, know what I mean, like judging people.
Speaker 2:So you know I got angry. Um, I think the day my father died I went to a carnival, right. I tried to just just wipe it away like it wasn't that big of a deal and it was. It was huge. I think it was the biggest thing in my life that I can point to right now. That really had an effect on who I was at that time. At that point I was a nerd. I wasn't allowed outside, so I didn't have a whole bunch of friends. I wasn't allowed to do things that normal kids were allowed to do. I was in the house, I was reading, reading or I had a chemistry set in my room. Yeah, Really.
Speaker 2:So my father was a regional sales rep for Philip Morris Right. My mother was an administrative assistant, you know so. So they had money, you feel me, they had. So I didn't come from a place of struggle, even though when I was, when I was first born this is what I'm saying where my father took us from, where my father and my mother both took us from right, and when I landed at 12, I I didn't have to do anything. You know what I mean. Like, money was there, I could do whatever I want. My great grandmother was very nice. She opened a bank account for me, put money in it, you feel me, but I wanted to get my own. You know me, but I wanted to get my own. You know what I mean. I wanted to get my own money. I wanted to do my own thing, you feel me. And after working, it just didn't add up. So I went to the street. It was fun. That's what it was. It was fun, it wasn't.
Speaker 1:I didn't did it because it was fun and it was actually hurting my mother. Wait Right. Flag on the play.
Speaker 2:Yeah, flag on the play. My mother, she was everything to me when I was younger. That's who I went to because my dad was super strict. So me and my mom would always talk and I remember her sitting on the porch and we were talking and she was like what do you want to be when you grow up? I said I want to be a doctor. You feel me, and I know my dad wanted me to be a preacher. You feel me. So I want to be a doctor. Mom, I got into an accident when I was younger and broke my leg.
Speaker 2:And I remember how they fixed my leg up right. Check this out. My dad comes home from work one day, me sitting on the couch. He said, all right, I'm tired of this Get up. So what you mean get up? We lived in the Benjamin Banneker. You know the long hallways Remember what.
Speaker 2:Dre said in the speech right, the Benjamin Banneker, we lived on the third floor, long hallways. He said come on, grab your crutches. We're going out here in the hallway. Yeah, you got to get your leg right and if you don't strengthen it you lose it. So come on, let's go. Takes me all the way to the end of the hallway, then takes my crutches from me, walk. Wow.
Speaker 2:Now, in today's day and time, people, oh man, he's abusive, isn't he? But what? He was teaching me? That, any way, anything that affects you and you allow it to affect you, it will affect you for the rest of your life. Right, so you got to walk through it. If it hurts, it won't hurt tomorrow when you do it, it won't hurt the day after that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and literally the doctor said I was going to miss school. I was back in school before the second quarter. Wow, pins out of my leg. So I walked that whole hallway every day when he came home from work. Pins out of my leg. So I walked that whole hallway every day when he came home from work and I read him the paper, like he asked me to. You know what I mean. So that's, that's, that's what my day consisted of right. So I was always up on current events, sports things. I was, I was, I was sharp bro, I was real sharp and um, I ran outside to hang with people that I'm not gonna say they were struggling, right, they didn't have everything Right, right, and you know me, due to, you know, not having that mean callous, you feel me, I'm sharing.
Speaker 2:Here oh you take this, oh, you can have this. Oh, you can do this, you can do that. That didn't make me too many friends.
Speaker 1:You know what?
Speaker 2:I mean so you work. So I was hanging out with the older kids and when my dad died, I moved down to Jeffrey Street.
Speaker 2:We lived on the east side and then I moved down to Jeffrey Street because that's where my grandmother was, and I felt that at that time my grandmother, she took to me a little bit more right when my father passed away. Come here, baby, I love you. You're smart, you're so smart. You can be the janitor or you can be the CEO of a company. Just don't lose the respect that you have for yourself. Oh wow, and do your job. You're the best person. No one else can do it better. And I understood that. I didn't understand it then, but I understand that now. And I understood that. Right, I didn't. I didn't understand it then, but I understand that now. You know what I mean. That's why I don't have a problem with coming in here and working every day. I don't have a problem with working the way I work. So, um, that that was my life from 12 to like why, why, why, why?
Speaker 1:was you angry with your mom, though? What made you like?
Speaker 2:The way she took my father's death. I didn't understand it. She was hurt.
Speaker 1:My mother was hurt.
Speaker 2:My mother lost a very special person and I didn't get it. I didn't understand.
Speaker 2:I'm like I lost my dad and I lost my husband. I had no plan on burying him, but shit, I lost a father. Like you know, you can get another husband, right? I mean, that's just how it was. Yeah, now, I wasn't lying, you know she could have. She could have met somebody, married him and had a whole another husband, but that's not what she wanted, right? My grandmother was the same way. My grandfather died in 1973. I never saw my grandma with any man and everybody always says man, you don't know what your grandma was doing. I was sleeping in the bed with her, so you know, I knew she wasn't doing anything crazy, but that's just that's how life was for my family. Um, but yeah, I came from. I came from, uh, opportunity, right, abundance you know, my uncle was a lawyer.
Speaker 2:My aunt worked for ibm. You met my aunt at, yeah, at the uh, at the gala. Um, my cousin, you know, that's my god sister, she's like my sister you feel me that's that's who I call on right now, when I need some somebody to talk to me.
Speaker 2:You feel me my sister, you feel me she's younger than me, but she feels like she's older than me. She always tells me she was the first one out, but she let me go right because I was such a baby. You feel me like, so she's like just go ahead go.
Speaker 2:but, um, you know my family, you know my family, you know my cousins. I experienced, you know, a lot of death early on in life. You know and for me it wasn't until, you know, my grandma died that it really hit me like hard and I kind of became I'm going to say it I became a junkie. I started smoking, I started putting cocaine on my weed.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:Crack cocaine on my weed and smoking like literally. So I smoked crack before. Okay, you know, and I was done, I didn't want to live anymore. And my grandma, I remember my grandma telling me she was like your wake-up call is going to come, because, when it comes, just hear it. I just want you to hear it because it's going to change your life. And I didn't, whatever, my mom.
Speaker 1:I hear you.
Speaker 2:She still loved me. I didn't really want her to know I was hustling, but she figured that out and then you know it was hard. It was hard growing up because because I came from people that had and I was around people that didn't have, I was around people that were struggling. You know, crack it. When crack hit it, hit Chester very hard, right.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:I mean. So everybody was, you know, either either smoking crack or selling, or selling, yeah. And if you wasn't selling crack, you was trying to find out how to get the crack, and if you wasn't trying to find out how to get the crack, you was trying to rob the mother. So it was just. It was that that game of cat and mouse that everyone was playing, and I didn't know where I fit in. So I tried everything. You know, I had a gun in my hand. You know I had crack in my hand. I had weed in my hand. You feel me Like I went to the plane with the females and doing that stuff.
Speaker 2:So for me there was no peace. I didn't really find peace until I opened this radio station. And people don't understand, right, when you have a dream, I always wanted to be on radio. That's my thing, right, I always wanted to do this. I always had a microphone in front of somebody's mouth, I was always talking to somebody, but it never materialized for me correctly. Right, I went to somebody, but it never materialized for me correctly. I went to college. I did a semester in college and I was like, okay, I can do this. Then my grandma hurt herself and I came home oh wow, I'm not going back to school. I can make money, I can get a job. My grandma always had a job. So 12th grade I was working for First Union Bank.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:Right, you know I had the suit and tie on. I was good, you feel me. They walk up in school. I was in school until 12 o'clock. Had enough credits to do that. They let me go out of school At school. I was done After 12 o'clock. Go straight to work. I was working basically a full day you know what I mean.
Speaker 2:So my grandma made sure I understood. You know who I was and I remember one day she dropped me off in front of the high school. She was like I love you. I was new to the high, I was new to everybody in the city of Chester. Who is this Jean-Pierre Right Like? Where is he from? What is he about? And you know, people tried me. I let them because I didn't want to be violent. My father always said when you fight somebody you're not friends. So take his eye out. You feel me Like there is no fair in fighting. You feel me, if you have an advantage, if you can grab him by his balls and squeeze, do that. Huh, it's like you know you're, you're a warrior and when you fight you're fighting a war. Someone is trying to take something from.
Speaker 1:But see, my father came from that area where he said we had to think about your father when he came from, came from haiti, like no problem, and then cut their toes off.
Speaker 2:I'm like what, what are you talking about, right? No, I don't want to do that. I don't want to do that Like wait, that seemed a little extreme, right.
Speaker 2:But you know now I understand what he meant, right? You know, when you're fighting, you're constantly fighting and you're fighting a battle, bro, if you leave a person up standing and they don't remember what, what happened when they fought you, they'll come back again, yeah, so you got to make sure they they remember why. Nah man, I lost this pinky right here fighting pierre, I ain't fooling with him, you feel me like, and that's what happened.
Speaker 1:So let me ask you a question. So you all right. So at 12, your dad passed away. Then you started going out on the street, start hanging out with people, and um, I think it's very interesting, though, that you came from a good background, right and, and then you still you went to the street to seek something like what, like you said one to make your mom and you because you didn't like how she responds to you that. But then what would the other reason be like, just to to do something like, because I often wonder how people come from very good households and they end up doing the craziest things.
Speaker 2:I think sometimes it's different reasons, right, everybody has a different reason, I think, for me, I wanted a father figure in my life.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 2:I looked up to the men that were out there doing what they were doing and they knew my father right. They knew the type of man my father was, so a lot of them they wouldn't fool with me.
Speaker 1:Right, you feel me.
Speaker 2:Like nah, jp, where your grades at you feel me. They knew how my father was. My father used to run around the Benjamin Banneker and get all the young men in the building downstairs in the laundry room to read. He was the one that was going to Holy Ghost Ukrainian Catholic School and teaching Spanish, and he wasn't even a teacher. He was very active in knowing what you don't know. Don't say you don't know. Go find out, go look it up. You got books. Go find it out. Don't come here and tell me you don't understand. Go read until you understand.
Speaker 2:Whenever I want to go outside, dad, can I go outside? Write me a one-page story on what's outside. By the time I got done, it was dark. Yeah, it's like no, that's not right. Nope, nope, nope, nope, nope. Take it back, write it again. I don't understand what's this about. You want to go outside and play with who? Who do you want to play with? You're gonna play by yourself. You can play by yourself, right there, right? So he was always challenging me to think you know what I mean and I and I and I lost some of that throughout the years of running the streets and playing around, but one thing he always told me, is be aware of your surroundings, and I and I and I kept that with me all the time.
Speaker 2:So if something didn't look right or something was funny, like yo I'm, I'm out of here. Yo man, where you going? I got to go home, bro, I ain't got time for that. Yo man, you missed it, man. I mean you came through here. It's like, yeah, that's funny. That was the point.
Speaker 1:That was the point.
Speaker 2:You know that weird feeling that I felt in my gut and I felt that a lot and I was like damn, All right, I got to go, All right, I'm out. Pierre man, you always missing when the da-da-da-da, that's the point.
Speaker 1:I think one of the things that I hear from you and I kind of relate a little bit too is that when you lose something or your life change instantly and as a kid you don't know how to handle that. You become angry, you become frustrated, you become like yo, because I remember, you know, I was told I was always a really good kid, but then at some point, like something switched and I became angry. I'm fighting teachers, throwing chairs at teachers, running down the hall, like doing crazy stuff. It was my dad left. My mom and my dad had separated Now I'm seeing a lot of. You know they had dealt with a lot of stuff in their marriage, you know, but when my dad left it really I was daddy's girl and that something triggered me to become very angry and start doing stuff that didn't even make sense, Like why would you do stuff?
Speaker 2:If you cared, you would be here.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:So why should I stop? I remember going to the mall. Ninth grade year I was at the academy and the minister of my church, reverend Sheryl, took me to the mall. He was in the gym working out. I was in the mall stealing.
Speaker 1:You just be doing stuff that don't make no sense, right? I know, Literally I was stealing.
Speaker 2:What I needed. I needed Wu-Tang, I needed the purple tape. You feel me? Oh shit, stealing what I needed.
Speaker 1:I needed, you know.
Speaker 2:I needed Wu-Tang. I needed the purple tape. You feel me I needed, oh shit. Now I need headphones. That was my problem. I went to Bosco's. I was cool in the wall, I tore them apart.
Speaker 1:Oh, that's good. So you went to Bosco's. I went there, listen.
Speaker 2:So I used to have this little razor I would cut. Look like I was stealing nothing. I looked like I was reading. They didn't think that my with schoolboy glasses on was in there stealing anything. They was looking at the other kids that was walking through there. I walked out of there with like three tapes and a Walkman. I was like now I need a pair of headphones. I'm going to go to Bosco. That was the worst mistake I ever made.
Speaker 1:You ain't going to Bosco. It was definitely the're supposed to take you. They had cameras.
Speaker 2:I was like oh yep, never come here again, yeah, but I think it's so.
Speaker 1:I think sometimes Parents don't realize the trauma that happens to children Once One parent Either Deceased or even just Out of Because it's almost Even when a parent Leaves the household, they're dead, and they're dead Like it really did. I literally felt like my dad was dead, absolutely.
Speaker 2:You got to call him and go crazy and get in touch with him and he don't want to stop by and coming through. It's like why you don't love me and I had that issue right, love, right why don't you. Why did my dad have to die Right Like why. Why did he dad have to die Like why did he leave me? What did he leave me with? That was valuable enough for God to say, okay, you did your job.
Speaker 1:You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:And I was always asking myself that question. But then, when I realized it, I was upstate and I was looking out the window and I remember being in the banner car, looking out the window and always asking my dad, can I go outside? He and I remember being in the banner car, looking out the window and always asking my dad, can I go outside. He was like no. Now, while I was going upstate I was running into different people.
Speaker 2:You feel me and I was like yo man, I remember your dad from the banner car. I remember your dad. I remember your dad. So my dad was on my mind. You know what I mean. I was thinking about him and I was like he was right. I was looking out the window and I looked out and I said oh my god. So the same three kids that was outside when I wanted to go outside were upstate Whoa, and I remember just feeling like it got cold in the cell and it was like, didn't I tell you?
Speaker 2:I said what you say, sully. He said nigga, I ain't say nothing. He said what's wrong with you? You all right? I said yeah. I said damn man. I told you. I said Sully, stop playing with me, bro. Like what is you down there talking about? He said, bro, I'm not saying nothing and you tripping. And he stood up and he looked at me. He's like you all right. I said yeah, I'm all right. I said yeah, I'm all right. I laid down. I just I cried. They had. They called yard out, the doorbell buzzed open. I didn't, I didn't move, I stayed on that bed. I was crying like I was, I was. I finally realized like yeah, he was telling me the right thing and I was running from it.
Speaker 2:Right, because when he died I just wanted to go outside, like that's it, like I wasn't worried about he was gone and nothing. I just wanted to go outside, not understanding that the things I was doing, you feel me, was going to affect me one day.
Speaker 2:It was going to catch up to me right and when it finally caught up to me it was like, all right, one one and a half years upstate, I'm going to go, no problem, I'll be home. My mom crying, is she upset? Is she mad? I'm like, no, it's not your fault. But in the back of my head I'm like, yes, it is, it's your fault. You should have sent me to Malvern. I had a 75% paid scholarship to Malvern and and she was like, no, you ain't going to Malvern, no, I ain't paying no money. I was like, okay, then you don't care about me, you don't love me, so fuck it, I'm gonna go to Chester High.
Speaker 1:I wreaked havoc in Chester High, not beating people up, just tearing the school right because you still was angry, though you had a lot of anger in you, and that's what happened and I never wanted to fight.
Speaker 2:Right, everybody always said, p why you ain't fighting? I never wanted to fight because I I, I never had that, that, that fighting spirit. You know what I mean. To be beating people up. I gained that over time, right, you understand what I'm saying. Like it took it, it took till I was probably like 19 for my first real fight, and when I knocked him out I was like, oh shit, yeah, that's how easy it is. Yeah, everybody's not easy like that. But I didn't realize who I was. You know what I mean, because I was great then and if I would have just stayed in school you feel me and did what I was supposed to do, who knows where I'd be right now so what made you?
Speaker 1:so you went upstate. You know you did your dirt out here in the streets. You became a street you. So you went upstate. You know you did your dirt out here in the streets, you became a street man. And then you went upstate. What made you because clearly you don't have any illegal ties right now, oh, no, no, no. So what made you say, nah, this ain't for me. Like was it in the cell, when you was thinking about, when your dad was talking to you. What made you really kind of change your life, though? About?
Speaker 2:when your dad was talking to you. What made you really kind of change your life, though? No, because I came home and you know I had to figure it out. I had to figure out how to feed four people. I had to figure out how to feed five people me and my wife at the time, and my three kids, Wow.
Speaker 2:So for me it was I'm not doing that anymore and that was selling cocaine. I'm not. I'm not even touching that white bitch because she ain't calling the cops on me. I'm sorry for cursing on your show.
Speaker 1:But that's how I felt.
Speaker 2:I'm not even touching that white girl.
Speaker 1:You feel me.
Speaker 2:They call the cops on me every time I touch her. I got to figure out what I'm going to do. So I came home for a minute. I got two jobs working. You feel me? I had to save my money up, um, and then, and then it hit me. I said ain't no weed out here, I'm gonna sell weed.
Speaker 1:That's what I'm gonna do right so and everybody like how you make it.
Speaker 2:It just so happens that you know, when I started, you know it was a little bit, you know, half pound here, pound here, you feel me. But it grew, you feel me. And then it was like, and, and it's crazy, the person that I got the money from, he always, he always tell me he's like, damn bro, like, and I love him.
Speaker 2:You feel me because he looked out for me, because I looked out for him, you feel me like before you went in, bro, you made sure I was straight, so here I want to get this to you. I was like, damn, bro, appreciate it. Like what you want. He's like no, I just want you to be good. So instantaneously I just jumped in and bought what I needed to buy. Now things happen in between that. But I ended up going to Mississippi to work on an oil spill and I went down there and I want to say I worked from August. No, no, no, no, I'm going back May until August in the summer in Mississippi.
Speaker 1:Oh.
Speaker 2:God Working on the oils, but it's 2010. And I met some people down there. I met a couple people and met some real good people, but I ended up going to Arizona and when I said it was cheaper there yeah, $200 a pound and it was green, oh yeah, yep, send that back. All those things happen, right, I went through all of it, right. And I come home and I look at it and I'm like, yeah, let's do this. But I had a little. I grabbed a little bit because my man was like you want this, because this is what everybody about to start smoking on for real, for real.
Speaker 2:Right for real, for real, right loud. Oh yeah. When I brought it back I had 10 pounds of reggie and a half a pound of lab. When I said half a pound went before the 10 pounds, I said, oh yeah, I gotta go back wow I gotta go back. So it was. It was a constant back and forth to arizona.
Speaker 2:You feel me and coming back here and I think I made I made a good amount of money. I was able to do things for my family and make sure everybody was straight. I didn't have to work. I stopped working. You feel me, it was all hustle. You feel me, it was all running. And I think when I began to think that I wasn't going to live past 37, I said my dad died at 37. I started drinking heavy.
Speaker 2:You feel me, I wasn't smoking but I was drinking and I just got down again, but you couldn't tell I was down right, had the car. All the business, but I was depressed. I was hurting right and no one knew why. And my 37th birthday. I had created four children outside of my marriage.
Speaker 1:Oh, okay, flying on a plane.
Speaker 2:Let's go back.
Speaker 1:All right, so okay.
Speaker 2:Right Four children outside of my marriage by three different women outside of my marriage, about three different women. The oldest one I didn't really think was mine so I really didn't pay too much attention. But he's come back in my life recently. When he called me dad, I just I started crying. You know what I mean Because I was that age when my dad died. You know what I mean and it's like how, when my dad died.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean. And it's like how can I ignore him? For 12 years I felt bad, bro, like I was hurting, you feel me. And everybody was like, well, you don't know. Look at him, bro, he looks just like my mom. You feel me. So that's my fault, that's due to my ignorance, right? And I don't know how long it will take for him to forgive me for not being in his life. But you know, whatever I have to do, I will try my best to do. You know I'm not going out and buying him sneakers every week, but you know, we can call, you can talk, come pick you up, get your hair cut.
Speaker 2:If I can't take you to get your hair cut, I'll send the money to your mom. Go get your haircut, right, right. So you know, when I saw all of that and I turned 37 and I looked behind me and I said, looking in the rear view, I was like I can't do this, I can't, I'm not going to be able to sell weed for the rest of my life.
Speaker 2:Either I stop now or I go upstate or I figure out what I want to do with the rest of my life. So I was always looking at Connecticut School of Broadcasting Like, see, there you go, I'm going to hit them up, I'm going to go there, I'm going to do that. And I called them a couple times and I was supposed to go up there and see it, but it never matriculated. It never happened the way I wanted it to happen, so I let it die. But the way I wanted it to happen, so I let it die.
Speaker 2:But when I turned 37, you know, I was in the house, I was drinking and me and my ex-wife were arguing. I was like man, I'm out of here and I went outside. I pulled up on 21st Street, east 21st Street. We were outside and everybody was out there and I was just looking. I didn't get was out there and I was just looking. I didn't get out the car, but I was just looking. I was like okay, and at the time I was still selling you feel me Now I had moved up to Molly.
Speaker 2:It was Molly, it was all the party drugs, right, I had it. You feel me, I'm the person you need to get with if you, you know, trying to get on right. So I was frustrated, though I was still upset, right. So I popped a molly, you feel me, went in the house and went with my wife, stayed there with my wife, got up the next morning and, um, I didn't want to hustle no more, right, it was like no, but I kept on doing it, right, hey, about the summertime going out with my cousin, we said we're going to go drink, we're going to the bar, all right, cool, went there. He said, yo, we're going to go to RS. I was like, yeah, all right. Typically I don't go to the RS, right, for the simple reason that it's in Ridley and if I get drunk I don't want to get pulled over. I'm always, you feel me Like?
Speaker 2:it always happens like that, right right right, and I never really drove without my stuff, so I was always dirty always riding dirty. You see me rolling. You're trying to catch me riding dirty, right. So I got jumped. I kicked in the face several times, almost lost my eye, but more than anything, I realized that I wasn't supposed to be there.
Speaker 2:I accepted accountability right then and there and when you accept accountability and you're out there in the streets, you're done. Right because you're saying it's my fault. Right? You're saying the reason why this happened is because I did this.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:If I would have done something else, I wouldn't even been here. So people don't want to hear that in the street, bro. They don't want to hear accountability. Good job taking account. No, they don't care about that, right? You know, you, in the streets, you ain't supposed to be taking no accountability for nothing, supposed to let shit fly and then go get mad at somebody for doing something to you. So the people that were around me were looking at me like I knew, right then it was over. I knew, right then it was over, so I had to sit.
Speaker 2:I sat in the house, had the eye patch on and was just trying to figure out where I was going, and I spent a lot of time in the house listening to kendrick lamar j cole you feel me like? These were the artists that I was listening to, and, um, they too had a dream. Right, that's what I took from listening to their music. They too, had a dream. And guess what? Their dream came true. So why the fuck my dream can't come true? Right, I went to therapy.
Speaker 2:I went to therapy with my wife trying to work things out, trying to get things. You feel me amicable. After therapy was over, she was like uh, you know we just co-parent him, right. That hurt but it is what it is right. So I ran outside again. You know now I got the molly, I got the alcohol. You feel me like I stopped selling the weed. I'm falling back from that, I'm slowly coming out of that.
Speaker 2:But I I remember I was hanging out with my man and his cousin was with us and she was beautiful, bro, like looking at her I was like, wow, man, like you know, she was young, right, she was younger than me and I knew her brothers and I just felt bad. You feel me Like the whole situation was just like you know. But she got in the car, you know we got to talking, me and him and her. We were talking about our dreams, what we wanted to do, everything and I told her I said I want to open a radio station.
Speaker 2:She was like you can do it, like you're never too old to dream, bang, literally. Like that was the first time any woman ever told me I could do anything but sell drugs, any woman ever told me I could do anything but sell drugs. That was the first time any woman other than my grandmother or my mother or my aunt or my cousin, right relation believed in me, bro. That gave me all the fuel I needed, right. When men say they need support, they don't mean I need you to do it for me, they just clap for me. Just be supportive, just sit there and say go ahead need you to do it for me.
Speaker 2:They just just just clap for me. Right, just be supportive, just sit there and say go ahead, baby, do it, you got it. Because now he going to run through that brick wall. But without that support he runs to that brick wall, he fall down, right, if you don't have somebody telling him how great he can accomplish, he ain't going to get past that brick wall. So at that point, when she told me that, bro, I felt like it was the best thing anyone had ever told me in my life. Bro. I felt like I hit the lottery and I did it. You know, I went.
Speaker 2:It was a radio station here in the city Shout out to Purple Queen, no Q. Tommy Went and talked to them and I was like, you know, I want to do radio. It was already here so I could just do a radio show. I didn't have to own a radio station and we were good and we were doing everything. Then they moved to Philly and I don't speak Philadelphia, I don't. They tell me, go talk to the mayor. I'm like I got my own mayor city council.
Speaker 2:I got my own city council. They come up here talk about the potholes I got my own power. You know what? I had a, a brother that was working at the radio station. He was a dj for a while. I started my own show, revolutionary minds, and he came through. He guessed dj.
Speaker 2:He said man whatever you need, man, hit me up, you up. You know we can talk. Chucky Johnson is the one that told me to hit him up. I was like man, I'm not calling him Like for what he's like, bro. He said whatever you need, so call him and tell him you need a partner. Bro, like, stop playing, like what's wrong with you. Call him. We agreed, gave me. I had everything already written down, cultivating mature positivity. It wasn't something that we had to come up with. I had the name called cmp radionet. I had everything. And he was like yeah, I, I could fuck with that.
Speaker 1:And we did it. Your mouth is just nasty. You know that I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Speaker 2:Yeah, we can mess with that right, right, and we did. Right. We opened up 9-2-17, which kind of reverses 12-22-79, right, without the other two, right, but my birthday was in that 9-2-17. Then the year my dad died was in that joint, you feel me Like my sister's birthday, which is, you know, 2-7, right? I just look at numbers. 12 was in there, you feel 2-7, right, I just look at numbers. 12 was in there. You feel me Like one my dad's. The only thing that was missing was my mom, you feel me, and that was the day my dad died. This is April 24th, so we coming up on the anniversary, right, and he'll be gone for 32 years.
Speaker 1:Wow.
Speaker 2:Right 32 years, 32 years.
Speaker 1:Let me ask you a question P Go ahead. So when you were out there doing your street stuff and you had your kids and everything, did you at any time say okay, I'm going to put my kids on, they're going to be out here selling the molly, they're going to be selling the drugs At any time? Did you like? This is about to be a franchise, we about to do some stuff here.
Speaker 2:No, the first moment I saw it was another reason why so I was. You know, my son always counted the fives and ones right, and he was over there counting the money, bought it up, put it in his pocket and I thought the only thing I can give to him is death.
Speaker 1:Wow.
Speaker 2:Like right now, me to have my son to think that this is what he's going to do. The only thing that he can do, that I can't do, is die in the streets.
Speaker 2:No, I'm not having that, I'm done. You feel me Like it was so many things that just was telling me, like get out, like don't, don't continue to do this, because I never really did it for anything until I had to do it for money, right, feel me like at first I was just hustling just to say, oh yeah, I got a pack. Oh yeah, I got this. Oh yeah, I can do that. Oh yeah, that ain't nothing, I mean, I got it. Then it became something that I had to do because I had to take care of my family, right. So then my attitude changed with it. You know what I mean. Like before I was cool with the bull short in me.
Speaker 2:Yo man, stop playing with me the other side came out you didn't really know that was in there right and I had to catch. The haitian side came out I had to catch myself a few times. You know like one thing about me, man if I know your mother, if I ever see your mother or your aunts or anything anybody related to you, your sister, I'm not going to hurt you, bro, okay. You know what I'm saying, and a lot of people took that as a weakness, and it wasn't until my cousin told me man, that's a strength, bro, you feel me, because the fact that you care about people, the fact that your heart is so big and you care about people and you wear it on your sleeve, that's not a weakness, bro.
Speaker 2:You feel me. A lot of people wish they had that much compassion in them To sit there and say man, I know your sister, bro, I'm not going to take it there with you, I'm not going to hurt you, I'm not going to shoot you, I'm not going to rob you, I'm not going to do anything to you to make you feel any type way you feel me like. So that was hard, bro.
Speaker 1:yeah because I often wonder, sometimes, when I see people who you know it's just in the family, like they keep hustling and the kids hustling the grandkids over and over again, it's like at some point, like, do we think that it has to stop somewhere? So you're saying, basically, you know, seeing your son counting those ones and fives, you was like, wait, hold up. You already had stuff in your mind talking about you need to get out. But that was that, would you say. That was the real, that the last straw maybe, or like something that said, nah, this ain't this, nah, this ain't what it is.
Speaker 2:That was it, that was it for me. It was nothing else I needed to see, other than my son sitting there counting those ones. Bro, it was a wrap, it was over. I can't do this. What am I doing?
Speaker 1:This is true this like oh, what am I doing? Like this, this is true, I think sometimes our kids, you know we'll be doing stuff in life and then we're thinking because sometimes we don't realize how things affect our kids, right, we just like, oh, it's about me, I need to do this, that and the other. And then kids come along and they, they start triggering, changing your mind. You're like, wait a minute, I'm thinking about this, I'm thinking about this now. You know, I remember when I first, you know, got when I first had my daughter, like before I had her, you know, I used to curse all the time. I was such an angry person. I mean, like you know how I don't do the cursing now, but I used to curse like if you looked at me, I would have cursed at you, I would have cursed at your grandmother, your mother, any like I was such a terror and angry. But once I had my daughter, like I didn't want her to be using that language or anything, so off the rip, I stopped cursing.
Speaker 2:Yeah, my son was the greatest gift. I have ever received in my life, and I'm not I'm not saying my daughters aren't, because they are, but you put a woman out in the world, she'll be cool Like a man. If she's good enough, a man will take care of her right. If she's on her game, right, she'll figure out how to survive. But men, it's different. Ain't nobody going to take care of you but you. You feel me, and if nobody put nothing good into you, you can't take nothing good out.
Speaker 1:Man, can we say that part again right?
Speaker 2:there. If nobody puts anything good into you and pours anything good into you, you can't take anything out, you can't withdraw anything. So, as a man, if you're out there and you can't withdraw anything, you're going to be angry, you're going to be frustrated.
Speaker 1:You're going to be mad.
Speaker 2:You're going to hurt somebody, then you're going to shoot somebody. You go do something to somebody. You rape somebody because you don't have nothing, ain't nobody give you nothing. So I feel sorry for those people. Bro, I do. You feel me, and if it wasn't for what I went through, I wouldn't have the capacity to do the job that I do today. You feel me Talking to kids and getting kids to understand that they are possible, not your dad, let's not worry about your dad, let's put your dad on the side.
Speaker 2:Who are you? Do? You know how possible you are and he said it at the award gala you know how special you are to make it.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Out of all the two million sperm that swam to that egg. You know how special you are to make it to that point, bro, to be here, yeah Right, that's a triumph in itself, right? So you are special. You do have a purpose. You're supposed to be here. Let that purpose out, you feel me. And that purpose ain't selling drugs. That person ain't robbing nobody. That person ain't getting mad at somebody for talking to your girl, or getting mad for somebody stepping on your sneakers that purpose is what you dream about.
Speaker 2:It might seem like a nightmare now because you don't understand how to get it, but once you start working on getting it, bro, it all makes sense, it all comes together I didn't know how to run none of this stuff I'm talking about none of it, bro. None of this equipment. I didn't know how to do another stuff. Youtube university taught me everything oh man, I love youtube university and then when we got the stuff, I was in here, bro, like in here, like first, first, first year.
Speaker 1:That's where I was you talk about.
Speaker 2:I lost my apartment for this for the radio station. I lost my car for the radio station. I lost parts of my relationship that I can't get back because of the radio station. I lost parts of my relationship that I can't get back because of the radio station. You feel me Like I lost a lot to have this. So when I say, bro, sacrifice is one of the biggest things you got to be okay with, Like you got to be okay with sacrificing, bro, Because if you're not okay with sacrificing, you don't really want nothing, Right?
Speaker 1:You know I often say this quote and I use this all the time. Denzel Washington says that Ease is a greater burden to society than hardship. Boy.
Speaker 2:Yeah, ease, having the easy. Yeah, it's a greater burden. Crazy, right, yeah, like so me looking at my son, he counting all the money I didn't want. I don't want you to have it easy. I don't want you to think this comes easy, bro. Do you know how much I've had to fuss and fight and scrap and spit and get spit on? You feel me. You feel me that's real, and the only thing I can give you right now, if I gave him this, the only thing I could give him is death, bro right.
Speaker 1:I think it takes a special person to really think about like listen I to say I'm giving you debt, like that's a wake-up call right there, like this is the only thing I can do for you because I've already.
Speaker 2:I've already see, it's like the kid is supposed to be greater than you right he done it all bro yeah I've already been there. I've already been in the greatest parts, except for having a room full of money, like I've already done it. So the only thing I can give you that was close to me is death. Yeah, yeah, and I'm not passing that down to you, bro I'm not passing these fears and these nightmares down to you, bro.
Speaker 2:I still had that nightmare about waking up in a big-ass room. You feel me, and nothing but convicts in that joint. You feel me Right. I didn't like going to Greaterford, bro. Stripping down and getting holes down, that was the most, I think, can. I go home now. I learned my lesson. I'll never do it again Right now.
Speaker 1:I quit, I quit, I quit.
Speaker 2:Even after all that stuff, I still came home and I still did it again.
Speaker 1:Right, but it had to take something To like really Get you Change your mind Completely, though. Getting kicked in the face yeah, I mean almost losing the eye. That's enough. I ain't gonna be able to see.
Speaker 2:And at that time I felt like I deserved it. I was on my knees when it happened. It was like bro you fell down to your knees and put your hands up. You didn't even block your face, did you fight back? I was drunk.
Speaker 1:Right, Like I'm talking about.
Speaker 2:Guinness and Jameson. That's what I used to drink. Don't nobody else drink Guinness, so I could pull up to the block with a six pack of Guinness and a big bottle of Jameson. Don't, nobody want to drink it. I'm drinking man. What is you drinking? I don't know why I drink that. I'm going to be drunk. You're going to be frustrated.
Speaker 1:So do you think so? You know parents. So, pete, you got eight kids. Yeah, eight kids. How old is your oldest?
Speaker 2:21. 21, 19, 17, 11, 10, 8, this 21, 21, 19, 17, 11 10, 8 and jordan three. Wow right twins. The twins are eight.
Speaker 1:Yeah. So what? What you know? Having all the life experiences that you had such a young age, still like you're still young. Um, you are young, you say so so I'm feeling it, I mean like your age. I mean people live. I'm in nursing. I see people at 100, 110.
Speaker 1:Yeah people live a long life. I don't live that long. But what would you say for parents out there who you know because you know where we from, you know we from you know we from the city where you know we? We don't see a lot of positivity. You really don't, and even after years of growing up here you really it's few, far in between. Right, there's some good people are doing some great things in the community, but at the same time there's still some hustlers. There's still some, you know some things like that. So what would you tell any parents who want to change their life or should change their life, not just for becoming a good person, but Go to therapy.
Speaker 1:Go to therapy.
Speaker 2:Absolutely Talk to someone that's not your friend. Talk to someone that's not on the other side of the bottle.
Speaker 2:Talk to someone that's not going to placate you and tell you you're right. Talk to somebody that's going to call you out on your shit. That's what my therapist did for me. That's exactly what he did for me and he sent me. He made me leave him with homework. He said go look up an internet radio station, Go look up how much it costs to start it, Figure that out, Come back and tell me. I said well, don't cost that much. He was like what started.
Speaker 2:Well, I heard there's already one in Chester. I don't want to step on nobody's shoes, you feel me yeah.
Speaker 2:But once they left bro, the market was open. So the moment they moved out, I was thinking about. The moment they moved out, I was thinking about all right, where are my radio stations going to go? You feel me Looking at different locations. I didn't have the money to do that and keep it. I might have had the money to get some equipment and different things like that, but to keep it, no. So I hit somebody up that might have had some expendable income and we were cool up until we weren't, and I ain't got nothing but love for him, like literally, because if we didn't come into contact then my dream wouldn't have been able to be fulfilled. You feel me Like, so I appreciate you and I'm going to fight for this joint. I work every day for this joint.
Speaker 1:And I just imagine, like maybe I don't know if your kids say it or may not say it, but they see your hard work and stuff and sometimes kids seem like they don't appreciate it, because that's just what kids do. But I think in the later on in life yeah, later on I didn't appreciate how hard my dad. I know.
Speaker 2:Right, my dad graduated college when he was about 32, 31. Graduated Temple University, right. I remember going up there. You know he might have been younger than that, right, but you know I don't do well preach.
Speaker 1:Kids don't understand and really appreciate in the midst of just like a lot of times, we don't understand and appreciate stuff while we in the midst of it then you look back you'd be like yo damn, I did all that. Yeah, like thanks. Thanks for letting me know.
Speaker 1:You feel me, but right that's real so one of the things that, before we close out, I wanted to talk about.
Speaker 1:So just thinking about how your life experiences you, you know again from, from the transition of your dad at 12 years old going to jail, hustling, doing all that stuff, now owning your own radio station and really recently just was awarded the Presidential Lifetime Achievement Award, I think that's just, that's just phenomenal, because that's not stories that you hear though we don't really hear stuff like that we hear that you know it becomes generational, right, things become generational and you know, oh, yeah, I remember your dad used to hustle, oh, you out here doing it now too.
Speaker 1:Or you know, your dad used to be a liar, like we always, for some reason, remember all the bad stuff that people do, and because it trickles down generation to generation. But it has to stop somewhere. So I think, just hearing your story and and knowing that listen, because every time I talk to you that you always talking about your kids though you be like my kids, you know you're in, be here sometimes, like you know, just to think about, like there was a time where you know those 18 months in jail, right, and you wasn't around your kids, like I know, you had to feel like the worst, like I felt I felt like a failure.
Speaker 2:I left my daughters in a vulnerable spot. I left my wife at the time in a vulnerable spot right um, and I didn't. I wasn't able to leave them with much. You know what I mean. But what I left them with they were able to use for them right right, um, and send me a couple dollars where you can. I felt like a loser, you know. I felt like, you know. I dropped the ball. So when I came home and I really felt like a loser because I was a, I was an addict, bro, you.
Speaker 2:I was constantly smoking weed and I was constantly dipping weed. I smoked three-time losers. I did everything, bro, Right you know, and I think that kind of messed my psyche up my brain, because I never was. When I was out here I wasn't able to think, like really think about what I wanted, Right, you know what I mean? It was just I'm just trying to get high. So it was the next side, the next side, the next side, the next side, the next side. A couple of dollars are here, the next side, the next side. So, you know, when I came home, I said, all right, I ain't smoking no weed. You feel me? I'm going to cut that out. So I had to get my life together, and I did. I gained a lot of weight, but I got my life together. But you're still here, though, absolutely.
Speaker 1:I think sometimes I'm a strong leader. Our life experiences really calibrates us into where our purpose and our destiny is. And just to know that, even because sometimes it's easier to go back to something you used to do because that was guaranteed money, that was a guaranteed thing. But there's something different when you really work for something and work hard, you feel better.
Speaker 2:You value your money. When you work hard for your money, you value your money. Yo, I'm not going to be wasting money on sneakers. Man, listen. Sneakers bro. Like beyond sneakers, like beyond. Listen sneakers bro. Like beyond sneakers. Like beyond beyond sneakers. Like too many pairs, I ain't going to never have that many feet in my life.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:For the amounts of sneakers that I have. But that's what I was in. I was into glasses and watches and sneakers.
Speaker 1:So you know, when I came home from jail, I said I have an addictive personality.
Speaker 2:Wow, recognizing that is helpful. Yeah, because I was chasing first. You know, when I came home I wasn't getting high, so I was chasing females.
Speaker 1:so it was constant that constant interaction.
Speaker 2:You feel me right.
Speaker 2:And then you know that that didn't work out too well. So now I went from chasing females to, you know, chasing chasing sneakers and chasing glasses and buying glasses. I remember at one time I had 15 pairs of glasses. What the hell I need 15 pairs of glasses for? I'm not going to wear all them glasses, but I wore them. You feel me? This glass went with these sneakers. Them glasses went with this shirt. You feel me?
Speaker 2:I didn't know that I had an addictive personality until I started going to the casino. It was like yo, I feel like I'm addicted to this shit. You feel me Right. And it was like you know, I feel like I'm addicted to this. You feel me, I feel like you know, no matter what happens. So let me find something else to be addicted to. And that's what a radio station came from. And, like I said, if I didn't have an addictive personality, I would have been here in the radio station trying to figure. I wouldn't have been arguing with people when they tell me come home. And I'm like, I'm trying to figure this out. I'm trying to figure out the best app to use, right, because when we first started we was using some little small camera right, and it didn't work the way I wanted it to work, so I was always trying to figure out the next move. When they came out with this app right here, I was like bet there it is.
Speaker 2:It's simple. You feel me, let me get it, let me get the equipment that work with it, and you have that. Those people that come into your life to assist you. They're not coming to hurt you, they're coming to assist you. Everybody always say, man, you always opening the door for people, you always letting people in, you, always telling people they can come back absolutely I think the sea.
Speaker 1:See, the seeds we sell will produce much fruit. Right, you know, is is. What kind of seeds are we selling? I think, when you know you sow good seeds, you're gonna. You're gonna think when you know you sow good seeds you're going to, you're going to get good fruit. You're going to get good fruit. You sow bad seeds you're going to get some bad fruit, right?
Speaker 1:So I think you know and that's the same thing like I think in parenting, like you know what we do to our kids, the seeds that we sow in our kids, they're going to produce fruit, right. It's what kind of fruit are we showing you know? Because if I see a fruit on that tree, that that fruit is rotten and everything I ain't trying to be like you, no, I'm not oh, that's gonna make my stomach hurt. I don't want that fruit.
Speaker 1:But if I see a fruit that's coming out the tree, that that does not just looking good but tastes good too, like it's a really good fruit because it's produced from an amazing seed, and I think that's, in parenting, what we have to do. I think one of the other things that I always think about in parenting is, like what we do really kind of set the precedence of where our kids can go in life, and I feel like stopping what you were doing selling drugs or whatever you were doing. You know, selling drugs or whatever you was doing, and your kids were able to see you stop that, though, because your son was counting with you, right, was counting his own money right there, so he see you go from one lifestyle to another, to this cultivating mature positivity right.
Speaker 2:We would ride through the city Everybody, every night, every everybody. Always say, man, you know everybody, right, it was right through the city, stop. Every time I would talk to somebody, they give me money. They would give my son a couple of hours so he would go in the house with money. So anytime I was leaving, my dad, I'm going with you he'd come in the house, break it down with his sisters. You share with his sisters and everything but for me just seeing him right and understanding what he could be possibly that killed me.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And it was like no, I can't do that. So changing was the best thing I could do for myself and my family. Right, coming up with this idea to have a radio station in the city that talks about the positive news. I don't share the murders I don't talk about, you know, the bad things, right? If we're going to talk about the bad things, I need both parties that were involved with the bad thing to be here. Right, because we're going to try to resolve the issue. You feel me, or have an understanding about the issue, and if we can't come to a resolve or we can't come to an understanding, the show will never go live. Because I'm going to talk to you before the show, like, listen, this is what happened, explain it to me.
Speaker 2:You explain it to me Now. Give me the truth. You know what I mean. And people, you could read between two people having an argument and say, all right, man, yeah, he a little too much, she a little too much, they both a little too much. You feel me, they both lie. You feel me. When people get loud and they pick their head up and they get to going like that, they're trying to intimidate you and there's a reason. What they're saying isn't true Because the person that's telling the truth, you ever had somebody tell you the truth.
Speaker 2:They ever yell it at you Never. No, they're like yo. I didn't do that and I'm sorry.
Speaker 1:You feel as though I did, but I really didn't do that and I'm sorry a lot of times people just have this cry out for help and they don't know how. That's why I think, when you said earlier about therapy is so important, because everybody needs therapy, you need somebody to talk to, because I think a lot of times you know there's a inner being that's crying out for help but don't know how to get the help or don't know how to express herself or have not have the emotional intelligence to be able to do things right, to be able to have great coping skills.
Speaker 1:So a lot of times, and then that trickles down to our kids too, because we scream and yell at our kids and then we mad when they scream and yell at us back. Well, you done taught them how to do that. But I think I love the fact that you know, even though there's so many challenges come up against you, even in a radio station, like you know, I'm in here, you know, and I get to hear and have conversation with you. But one thing what I love about you and your spirit is that you keep pushing forward. You won't let it die. This is your dream, and I think about some of the great people who didn't let you know.
Speaker 1:Martin Luther King, who I had a dream like, even though he was taken out, but his dream is still going forward Like he, literally. You know, we celebrate that man even in his death. And to be celebrated even in your death. That means you made a great impact on you as a life. Like we ain't talking about, you know, no negative stuff. We talking about the impact that you made in your life and I think that that's so important to just keep pushing, because even if we don't see certain things today, we might not even be here to see what God has in store for. You know the vision that we put forward, right Like the generational and legacy that we put forward. So I tell any parents out there listen, you got a dream. You know you want your kids that you have a. You want your kids to live. You don't want them to live like you've lived or you want them better than you are. You got to put the effort into yourself, oh absolutely.
Speaker 1:You know, it starts with you, it starts with us.
Speaker 2:You can't be a do as I say and not as I am parent and that's who I was. Yeah.
Speaker 1:That's how most of us was Pete. That's how most of us was Pete. That's how we grew up Like.
Speaker 2:I feel like that's how I was, but I was doing it to the point where you know. I remember the first time my daughters and my son, you know they took money out of my pants, you know, to take to school. They was taking big money to school too. They wasn't taking no tens, they was taking Every morning I woke up.
Speaker 2:I said Like my godson, he tore me up. You feel me, Like to the point where now he don't speak to me, but I love him nonetheless. You know yesterday was his birthday. So happy birthday, q. But you know, like my daughters, they did the same thing. They went in my parents' pocket. I did the same thing to my mom, so it's supposed to come back. It comes back. Understand, god has a way of bringing right back to you. You feel me. If you ever did anything to anybody, it's going to be your turn one day. I remember being down under the commodore barry bridge gun on my head, butt naked. You feel me. Well, y'all gonna pull the trigger or what's up. Well, we ain't never seen you down here. I'm not from down here. I'm not. And if you ever wanna rob anybody else, just hit me up and I'll help you do that. Right, I cannot, literally I could say what needed to be said At that time, right? Alright, man, put your clothes on, you can go Right.
Speaker 1:You feel me, man, god Like Yo can go right, you feel me and god is like yo. It's crazy, though, because to think about all the things that we go through in life and experiences that we have, and then where god has us said that, where we are now, just like something I don't know. Pete, before we close out, when you were really young, like I know, you said that you want to do radio and everything, but when you were really young, um, did you think that you would have your own radio station now?
Speaker 2:No, and, like I said, it's many paths to your destination. You know, I see CMP as a training ground for young people to be able to come here and learn how to be a radio podcast, learn how to tell their story with love, learn how to communicate Right their story with love, learn how to how to how to communicate right. Yeah, somebody come here and then they fall in love with radio, or somebody is seen and they get picked up and people like there are tons of people out there, right, that are watching lives all the time, looking for people, right? So hopefully one day somebody gets picked up off this dream not saying it has to be me, but it could be someone else and guess what? That's my dream, yeah, you feel me. So if that happens for somebody guess where, guess where I am I'm happy, right? I don't, I'm not. I didn't create this for me solely. You know what I mean. So this is a, this is a community operation. You feel me?
Speaker 2:If I get more people to come here and help me out of the radio station, I let whoever want to come through and help. If they don't stay, that's because they got to make money. Trust me, they ain't leaving because I did anything to them. They got to go make money, right, they can't sit up here and play around all day. You feel me. They can't be in the house. You in the house and your husband see you at the radio station all day. He's gonna feel some tight way. You ain't doing nothing here. Why you always over there, right, right, and it's not that he's mad at me, he's mad at the fact that you don't see that. Maybe you've got to go get a job. Maybe you need to cut down the amount of hours you spend here, the amount of things that you're doing for here. Right, that's life, though you know what I mean. Like time is the greatest deceiver, because it makes you think you have enough, and you don't. I have enough, I can do it later.
Speaker 1:I'll wake up tomorrow and you don't, you know when we were younger, they used to have their quote. Why put off?
Speaker 2:what you can do tomorrow, what you can do today for tomorrow. Yeah, yeah, I remember that growing up.
Speaker 1:And that's so true though, because it's like you don't even know about tomorrow, like there's so many things that's happening, and just knowing that, listen, if I can do this, if I have this in my willpower, do today, let's just get it done.
Speaker 2:yeah, um, all right well, it's been a pleasure, it's been real, it's definitely been real.
Speaker 1:I appreciate it I definitely, um, I love having a conversation with you and I wanted the people really hear your heart and you know the things, the transformation that you made in your life. You know I'm not done yet, though you gotta understand.
Speaker 2:Life is so many twists and turns in it. Right, you think you think you've accomplished this, but you got so much more. You gotta accomplish so much more. You have to apologize for so much more. You have to be accountable for. I have to be accountable to you know, every woman that I've ever ran across, bro, because at some point I was lying about who. I was right. At some point I didn't love myself and, like I said, if I don't love myself, how the hell could I love you? You can't you feel me so?
Speaker 2:you know, don't be don't be mad at me because I'm a little off, you feel me, because I'm going through some things, but I have to apologize, right, and when I apologize that doesn't mean I'm doing it, so I don't have to hear anything. But once you say you forgive me and you cool, there's no reason for us to go back and visit that in the past anymore, because now, now we're living in the past and I can't do anything. Living in the past, the past is done already.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, I keep moving forward and apologize, shake it off and keep it moving the present and the future is where I am right.
Speaker 2:So you know, let's see how we can make it better, right? How can? I make it better, so that's all I want.
Speaker 1:All right. Well, you heard it from here at C&P Radio. This is Parenting with a Purpose. I am your host, donna Janelle. Remember we want to bring nobility and beauty back into parenting and remember it may not. You know, parents are the bows, children are arrows and they're going to land, as you see, having a conversation with p today, right, there's some. You know. I'm quite sure a lot of where he's land now is really strength from his dad, as he talked about. You know, even only having 12 years of his life with him, that there are some seeds that's sown as producing fruit right now. So we, as parents, we got to make sure that we're sowing the proper seeds. You know, may not look like it today, but that fruit will produce. So just sow some good seeds out there so our children can produce much fruit.
Speaker 1:Thank you, hi, everybody my name is Donna also known as Donna Janelle, a CEO and founder of Parenting with a Purpose. Our strive here at the podcast is to reach every home, whether single moms, married single dads, whatever it is, foster parents, whatever just bringing the ownership and responsibility and nobility back into parenting. Get comfortable with uncomfortable conversations. All parents need some help and guidance and I'm just here to be a guide.
